yourheadispunk's Xanga

Daylight Is Coming (and Mom update)...

Thu, 05 Nov 2009 20:02:10 GMT

Last Friday was absolutely bonkers for me at work. We had three bands (Abandon, Fireflight and Remedy Drive) come in for live on-air interviews within a span of three hours. Needless to say, that's a lot for anyone. It all ended up going pretty well... even the interview with Fireflight after they had JUST gotten into a car accident on the way over and were pretty shaken up. My favorite, though, was Remedy Drive. Honestly, the interview sucked... they were awesome, I was the one who was really lame. But afterwards they stuck around and chatted with us (well, the two out of the four fellas that came anyway), and they were so sweet. I met them previously and geeked out all over them about how I had had their CD in my car for months straight and just loved every single song on the album, Daylight Is Coming. Well, yeah... I kinda geeked out again... couldn't help it. I know most of you have heard me rave about the band and their songs over the past here... heck, I've posted two or three (more?) of their entire songs here for you guys to read 'cause they just impacted me so much. I never really fully explained why, though. I don't think.

Basically, I saw them open for Nevertheless and The Afters last December (Live @ Mokah) and was really impressed with their live show (they are all over the place, the lead singer does crazy flips and dives off his piano). I took their album home and fell even more in love with them with each new song I heard. Not only the sound, but the lyrics were so full of hope and light. It wouldn't be long after that that we found out about my mom's breast cancer. I remember driving in the car and listening to the CD as I had been all that time, but each song hitting me in a completely different way. God totally spoke through those songs of hope directly into my heart, saying "Jade, seriously... hello! Daylight is coming! There is hope!" and it really helped to give me peace with the situation and put it in God's hands and know that it was going to be ok. A few months later, I was feeling really dry spiritually. We had been out of church for a while and it was wearing on me, I felt somewhat distant from God at the time. Another one of their songs, that I heard a million times by now, completely hit me in a new way... and again God spoke directly into my heart. I was asked to church by a friend and started going pretty regularly and started hearing the messages I needed to hear on a regular basis. So yeah, that album and that band means a whole lot to me - so I told 'em so and it was awesome!

Some of you have asked what the latest with my mom is... well, she had some scans recently done to see if the chemo/radiation/surgery had done it's job. They told her at the place that the scans looked good, but they told her that last time and we all know they weren't good at all. So, this morning to be exact, my mom came to pick up Preston and handed me a letter and told me to read it. She looked pretty serious so I was nervous. It was from the radiology place or wherever she got the scan done and the first line said something to the affect of: A spot was found, but it probably benign (non-cancerous)... please see your doctor, blah blah blah. Whoa. Another spot? Here we go again?!?!? I looked up from the paper and said, "So... there's another spot now?" And she kinda lightened up a little and said, "Well, that's what I thought it meant too." She then went on to say that she called the place, they told her they couldn't tell her anything, she had to call the doc. At this point she was freaking out 'cause it was all happening again. So, she called the doc and they explained to her that the stupid radiology place just sends out a form letter like that, the only spot they saw was the place where they had previously cut out the cancer and radiated it... not a NEW spot at all. WHEW! Why in the HECK would they send out a horribly scary form letter like that to people in my mom's position... NOT COOL AT ALL. Gave us all quite a scare. Anyway, my mom goes next week to see her oncologist and talk about the scans and everything, so she'll have a better idea then what the actual news is, but apparently it looks good as of now. Sigh. Praise Jesus, the daylight IS coming!

Halloween 2009

Mon, 02 Nov 2009 20:39:53 GMT

Preston and I got up on Saturday morning and went to Michael's... they were doing a Halloween session for kids. Preston got to make a ghost out of molding clay and a spider web frame thingee... plus he got a candy bucket, some candy and a balloon. He had a lot of fun doing that. Then we ran some errands.

That evening we went to the church I've been going to, Grace Fellowship Church's, trunk or treat.

Preston dressed as a "tool man," but people kept saying he looked like "Bob the Builder." Preston's never seen that show so he had no idea what they were talking about. After that trunk or treat, we went to Shreek at the Creek (The Church on Rush Creek's fall fest) and had a great time playing games and scoring tons of chocolate! Michael even won some brownies at the cake walk. Woo hoo! It's a good thing it only took us two rounds to win, 'cause I fully intended to play as long as it took to bring home a cake. Haha! We had a great Halloween.

Unfortunately Sunday was not as fun. It started out ok... Preston and I went to Target to get some discounted Halloween candy/stuff, then to church. After church I remembered I needed to pick up some milk at the store... that's where it got bad. Preston threw a hysterical fit in the middle of the store because I told him not to put the basket around his neck. Seriously? Yeah. I had to snatch him up, grab the milk and get outta there ASAP. From then on out, everything threw him into a fit... he talked back, he didn't obey and he refused to nap. Just one naughty thing after another. That evening we took a walk (had to strap him in the jogging stroller to get him to comply) and he FINALLY fell asleep. After his little nap, he was a little better, but it didn't last long. I dunno if it was the time change, getting off schedule or the excitement of the previous day... or what. Just another one of those "terrible three" days. They haven't been nearly as bad or as often lately, so I'm definitely grateful for that... but Sunday was rough... especially after having such a great day on Saturday. Whew.

Bebe #2 Update...

Tue, 27 Oct 2009 17:09:45 GMT

Had the "big" ultrasound yesterday, and... we are still having a "Little Brother." At first the tech was like, "Really? They told you boy? 'Cause I'm not seeing that.... no wait, ok, yeah... definitely a boy!" Haha. Made me a little nervous there for a minute. I'm pretty much already set on boy mode. Sure, we want a girl too... so, maybe next time!

Anyway, the tech checked on every little bit and part of the baby, measured, notated, etc. Everything is pretty much right on track. She pushed my due date back just a few days, so we're still due the first week of March, that's cool. Baby is healthy and active. I'm defitely feeling that myself... he has periods of being very active in there, so I know things are cool.

Still mulling over names. Preston loves to play the game "let's think of a name for our baby!"... we just start throwing out some of the most ridiculous things we can think of. "Picture Hanger," "Book Head," and "Preston James Clark II" are some of his favorites. He wants us to call our kids 1 & 2.

Other than that, things are good on the baby front. We are still heavily looking for Michael another job (as in a different one or one in addition to the current one), so that I might be able to stay home with the kiddos at some point. But, so far... no luck. We've had several good leads lately, hoping... praying... something turns up soon.

G2C2 Texoma Summit 2009

Mon, 19 Oct 2009 19:51:26 GMT

I didn't know what the G2C2 stood for either, but Val explained it was our last names - Goodwin, Gaffney, Cunha and Clark. Ohhhh, gotchya. Four couples, two kids, two dogs spent the weekend on Lake Texoma in a ramshackled lake house/cabin thingee and had a great time.

There were places in the flooring that had no support, someone could have quite literally fell through the floor had they stepped on it just right. I can't complain though, via drawing, Michael, Preston and I won the King Sized Suite at the cabin. It had a King-Sized bed, couches, giant bathroom with jacuzzi tub and Preston had his own little nook with a twin bed.

We sat around, played games, but mostly ate, ate, ate... and ate some more. Definitely a relaxing weekend.

We did take a nice, long walk beside the lake. The weather was just perfect for that sort of thing.

It was really great getting to hang out with our friends, just taking it easy. Definitely looking forward to next year!

20 weeks - Half way there!

Thu, 15 Oct 2009 21:47:49 GMT

Baby #2 is half-way cooked! Woo hoo!

I guess I didn't take a picture at 20 weeks with Preston (or I couldn't find it at last). Found this one, though (21 weeks), close enough...

Even When...

Thu, 15 Oct 2009 13:23:36 GMT

I posted the lyrics to this song nearly 5 years ago (Nov. 10th, 2004 to be exact)... but I heard it again today and it still hits me the same as it did back then. Just powerful words, such truth, such a lesson to be learned...

This week, I prayed, one time
My phone, it rang, I put You on the other line.
And now my thoughts they drift around,
My knees remain unacquainted with the ground,
Unless my faith is put to the test and I am forced to bow.
Although I'm in this flesh it doesn't mean,
You shouldn't have the best from me, from me.

Even when my eyes are dry,
even when my soul is tired,
even when my hands are heavy, I will lift them up to You.
It's not about how I feel, oh Lord I am here for You.
I exist for you.

I close my eyes but all I see,
Is a background of black, bouncy squiggly lines.
And this week's mistakes coming back to mind but
I will lift my voice and make a joyful sound.
Forget about me, I only get me down.
Although I cannot see it doesn't mean I shouldn't sing to You, to You.

Even when my eyes are dry,
even when my soul is tired,
even when my hands are heavy, I will lift them up to You.
It's not about how I feel, oh Lord I am here for You.
I exist for you.

You've given me Your life and have held mine together
Yet I find excuses to slouch in my pew.
But when glory divine,
Is sitting in my very presence, the least that I can do,
Is give my all to You, give my all to You.

Even when my eyes are dry,
even when my soul is tired,
even when my hands are heavy, I will lift them up to You.
It's not about how I feel, oh Lord I am here for You.
I exist for you.

State Fair of Texas 2009

Wed, 14 Oct 2009 15:59:51 GMT

Despite the rain and drizzle, we headed out to the Great State Fair of Texas yesterday. Me, Michael, Preston and my mom! We had a great time, and managed to stay dry. Thankfully, just after we arrived the drizzle stopped and never really started back up. Woo hoo, praise Jesus!

We ate corn dogs, peanut butter fudge, deep fried butter (Michael just HAD to try it, of course) and funnel cake. Nom nom! We got to ride the Skyway thing, it goes up way high over the Fair... normally would be a great view of the city too, but because of the low clouds... couldn't really see much at all. Haha. Preston got to ride some kiddie rides, and of course, LOVED that. We saw The Killdares perform... love them!

Preston riding the bumper cars.

Headbangin' to The Killdares.

He was pretty excited about going to The Fair!

Deep fried butter (w/grape jelly)

Mmm, funnel cake!

Excited about Big Tex!

Michael and Preston on the log ride!

The rest can be seen here. Last year's fair pix here. 2007's fair here.

Pumpkin Patch 2009

Mon, 12 Oct 2009 16:00:29 GMT

One of my favorite parts of Fall is taking Preston to the pumpkin patch to have fun and take pictures. Then getting pumpkins to decorate our yard. I'm not much on Halloween, so we don't usually carve our pumpkins, just set 'em out whole near our scarecrow in the front yard as Fall decor. So fun!

Here's a comparison of past pumpkin patch years, so you can see how much he's grown...

2006:

2007:

2008:

2009:

Here are some more fun ones from this past weekend...

Met up with some friends from high school at the patch! Shanta, Sarah, Cynthia, Amanda & me.

More here.

Tired of Mediocracy, But Unwilling to Change?

Wed, 07 Oct 2009 15:42:20 GMT

I haven't been doing a very good job of keeping up with blogs I'm subscribed to. I have my list here on Xanga, which isn't hard to keep up with 'cuz there aren't very many Xangans left these days. But I also keep a list over on Blogger of people I want to keep up with. Most are people I personally know and are friends with, but there are a few that I just enjoy stalking. Great writers who are mostly mothers, so I relate to a lot of their writing... but mostly am just thoroughly impressed with their style, how they capture experiences and are able to pour them out in print so that you feel like you are there, part of it. I am in awe of those that can write, I guess.

So after catching up on those particular type of blogs, I usually end up depressed and disappointed in myself. Why can't I be a great writer like them? What makes them so special? They're stories are about the same as mine, only they have a way of expressing them so much better. I liked writing in school, but I never excelled at it... or tried all that much at it. Maybe if I had... I don't know. It just all causes me to look at myself and go, "Why can't I be a great writer? A great photographer? A great cook? A great businesswoman? A great housewife? A great scholar?" I have always had this thing about wanting to be good, REALLY good at something... anything, really. I mean, I know we all have things we want to do, that we want to be good at. Most people do have that thing, and they put their time and energy into it. I'm not sure I've ever really found my "thing." I'm mediocre at pretty much every.single.thing I do. And that's not good enough. And in the same breath, I go... "But, I'm tired. I'm working. I'm pregnant. We don't make enough money. I don't know how." Excuses kill hope, good intentions and inspiration.

A good writer would know where she was going with all this. I.don't.

10-Year Class Reunion... conquered!

Mon, 05 Oct 2009 18:28:56 GMT

So for the past few months, 4 of us have been scrambling to organize our 10-year high school reunion. Well, Saturday... we pulled it off! Woo hoo! We had 46 attendees, which is awesome... consider just a few weeks ago we had like 4 RSVPs. Haha. Thanks to Amber, Katie and Ashlee for helping make it happen! It was a huge success I would say!

On Friday, I took Michael and Preston to their first-ever high school football game. I hadn't been to one since '99, and then... I was in the band, so that's what my perspective always was... watch football?, haha, yeah right. Anyway, we ran into about 6 or 7 other classmates and had a good time hunting down other people we knew and watching the band perform. Oh, the memories of being out on that field!

On Saturday, Michael and I arrived early to help set up. The actual reunion was in one of the side rooms at Mercado Juarez in Fort Worth. We got the tables ready and all memorabilia. I wish I had taken a photo of Amber's amazing memorabilia set up... it was unbelievable. That girl kept EVERYTHING from our 4 years in high school! Haha. It was neat. People started arriving and mingling. It was great. Really neat to see everyone. The food was awesome as well - mmm, fajitas! Amber came up with some fun gag awards that we gave out to people... so funny, so much fun. We also did door prizes, trivia and just some general announcements. Mostly, we hung out. Some of 'em ended up going out afterwards and apparently they had a lot of... fun. Haha.

Jade, Shannon, Amber, Alayne, Ashlee and Katie (some of the girls)

We tried to get serious and silly group shots, not sure either of those ever happened. (Stole this picture from DJ).

Jade, Michael.... Sarah, Zach (stole this one from Crystal).

Should have more pix to share when we get the CDs back in from our professional photographer... I'm sure those came out much better than mine! Can't wait to see!

All in all, I'm glad we pulled it off... not just pulled it off, but conquered. Everyone seemed to have a great time, there weren't any disasters (that I know about) and all the money worked out. Woo hoo!